A former assassin, Marvin Gable (played by Ke Huy Quan), has found a second life as a real estate agent. Matter of fact, he’s so successful in this new life that his boss, Cliff (Sean Astin), has presented him with the Agent of the Year award. This symbolizes to “Marv” that he’s going to be just fine after leaving “the life.” But, just when he thinks he’s moved on, he receives a Valentine’s note from his old flame, Rose (Ariana DeBose), and he gets sucked right back in thanks to some loose ends on a prior job. “The Company” is run by Marv’s brother Alvin (Daniel Wu) and he had previously tasked Marv with killing Rose, a lawyer for the criminal organization, but he couldn’t do it based on his love for her. Well now Rose has come back to get revenge and the two must combine powers to get out of this ordeal alive.
Let’s start with the performances because Quan is great. He comes across as comfortable and magnetic. DeBose is also solid with what she’s given. Even former NFL running back Marshawn Lynch — who is amazingly credited as “Beastmode” — is believable in his supporting role. All the aforementioned stars were great. It was the project that let them down.
It would be interesting to dissect DeBose’s character in particular. She plays Rose as if she’s a psychopath. She chuckles maniacally when she’s about to fight someone, her weapon of choice is the taser so she can torture people and she takes joy in cutting off body parts. But then, other times, she’s sensitive and receptive.
As the movie goes on, a pattern develops that begs the question: did director Jonathan Eusebio or the writers Matthew Murray, Josh Stoddard and Luke Passmore change the story some time after they shot the movie? There was so much ADR used with seemingly dozens of scenes not showing the person speaking but rather a reaction shot instead. ADR is nothing new for movies but this was so frequent that the audience is left to wonder what went wrong.
Also, if you’re hiding from an assassin underworld, why would you become a real estate agent and plaster your picture on bus stops, billboards and signs? Sure, Rose was supposed to “stay dead” but, for someone wanting to move on with their life, that wasn’t the best profession for the writers to come up with.
LOVE HURTS has no idea what it wants to be. It’s an action movie, sure, but does it also want to be a comedy? Does it want to be a thinking-man’s film? It did neither of these very well but seemed to flirt with both at different times. There’s a serious crisis of identity with LOVE HURTS and the performers can’t save it.
JKG SCORE: 4.5
Untitled Film Project 